5 WAYS TO OVERCOME THE FEAR OF PUBLIC SPEAKING

Like it or not at some point in your career, business, or life you will be required to give a talk or make a presentation to influence and persuade people to buy your product or see things from your point of view. At such times the skill of presentation and persuasion will come in very useful.

Many opportunities and clients are lost to less competent competitors due to a lack of presentation skills. At the end of the day, it is the company or individual that can persuade and move the client emotionally, psychologically, and financially with their oratorical prowess that wins.

As a professional business speaker i have moved people consistently with my speaking skills and earned money doing it, so i know a few tricks that can help you overcome your fear of public speaking……

  1. VISUALIZE YOUR SPEECH FIRST IN YOUR MIND: Your mind cannot tell the difference between an imagined experience or a real/objective experience. What that means is that, if you mentally imagine in full detail your speech and the standing ovation you’ll receive after your speech, when the day eventually comes when you’re required to give the speech your nervous system will say ”We’ve done this before, let’s do it again.” Top performers from business people to sports arrow heads do this regularly before they perform. On the other hand,  if you imagine yourself giving a tacky speech and being booed off the stage that is what will also happen, so choose your mental images carefully.
  2. PRACTICE YOUR SPEECH IN FRONT OF A MIRROR: I do that frequently. Winston Churchill one of the worlds greatest orators did that frequently also during his time on earth. By practicing your speech in front of a mirror, you’ll get used to your content and how you sound which reduces tension and anxiety.
  3. BODY LANGUAGE OF CHAMPIONS: You can trick your mind by your body language. Remember i said in the first point that your mind cannot tell the difference between a real experience or an imagined experience. By assuming the posture or physiology of a public speaker that you admire, your brain and nervous system also follows the instruction. So go ahead, act and stand like a confident public speaker during your presentation and you will speak confidently.
  4. PREPARATION: Knowledge gives confidence. Research the topic you’ve being asked to speak on and deliver it with passion.
  5. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE: What kind of people will you be speaking to? When you research your audience ahead of time, it will help you frame your talk, dress up, and present in a bespoke way that resonates with their model of the world, because remember ”People like doing business with people that are like them.”

 

THE POWER OF STORIES WHEN MAKING PRESENTATIONS

“Stories are the frosting on the cake not the cake ITSELF.’’ – DALE CARNEGIE

Stories are very powerful and emotional. When you connect to your audience emotionally they’ll connect with your ideas, buy your products, and do whatever you ask them to do.

Stories are the oldest form of communication. Over 2,000 years ago, Jesus Christ used stories and parables to influence, motivate and persuade people about his ideas and concepts of the potency of humanity and how that God now lives in man. Today, billions of men and women call Jesus their Lord and Saviour.

Let’s see one of his stories (recorded in Luke Chapter 15) and the lesson behind it:

“There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.

“Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

“When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

“The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

“Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’

“The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’

“‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

This is the story of the prodigal son, and it speaks about: Unconditional love, forgiveness, repentance, self discovery, fatherhood, family life, wrong choices and decisions.

A lot of people know that story even those who don’t believe in Jesus Christ, this is because the lesson applies to all of humanity regardless of skin colour, religion, or gender.

John Kotter, an organisational change expert, writes: “Neurologists say that our brains are programmed much more for stories than for abstract ideas. Tales with a little drama are remembered far longer than any slide crammed with analytics.”

In your speech, weave a story around your key points. People might not remember the statistics you gave about poverty, but they’ll remember the story you told about how you were poor and literarily eating from the dust bin and how a good fellow saw you, gave you an inspirational book to read that changed your life and now you give talks to inspire other people to dream.

HOW TO TELL A STORY

  1. Be descriptive; Engage the senses of your audience members by telling a story.
  2. Physiology: Let your body also tell what your words are saying.
  3. Every story should have a villain and a hero: For example, in the above rags to riches story I just told, poverty is the villain and success is the hero.
  4. Highlight the lesson in the story for the audience.

EFFECTS OF STORYTELLING ON YOUR AUDIENCE

  1. It keeps their attention
  2. It makes your key points easier to remember
  3. It makes the audience have empathy for the speaker
  4. It brings out the common humanity between the speaker and the audience so that the audience members know that the speaker is also going through (or has been through) what they are going through.
  5. It helps the speaker connect emotionally with the audience.

USE SHORT VIDEO CLIPS

I used a clip from the movie ‘Courageous’ to teach integrity to some doctors and nurses during a talk I gave on Customer Service and they were really inspired.

THE BENEFITS OF USING SHORT VIDEO CLIPS

  • It evokes emotions of hope, love, trust, fear etc, depending on the type of emotion you want to generate. People take more emotional decisions than logical ones.
  • Short video clips engender conversation and the sharing of ideas in class.
  • It is a creative way to get your point a

COLLECT, STORE, AND DEPLOY STORIES

To be a master storyteller you must be a collector of relevant stories. There are stories everywhere these days, from newspapers to blogs to conversations in the office and even personal stories, which are even more powerful. Just become aware and look out for stories and they’ll come to you because when the student is ready the teacher will show up.

5 SIMPLE WAYS TO WOW YOUR WOMAN

 

A Nigerian pop singer by the name Wande Cole sang a song, ‘’My woman, my everything, my woman oh my everything’ The song simple echoes the importance of a women in the equation of a mans life.

Having a woman that gets you is so life enriching, to help you take your relationship with your special lady to the next level, lets look at 5 SIMPLE WAYS TO WOW! YOUR ‘WOMAN OH’

  1. AFFIRM HER: While men are moved and incited by what they see, women are motivated and assured by what they hear. To affirm means to offer emotional support, by saying words of affirmation to your lady you build up her self esteem and self confidence in herself, her beauty, and her body. Tell her she is beautiful, praise her strength and focus less on her weaknesses.
  2. SURPRISE HER WITH GIFTS: The human mind likes and craves novelty, newness, and freshness. By buying her gifts, it doesn’t have to be expensive, you’ll make her feel special and nine times out of ten she’ll reciprocate the feeling back to you. So go ahead, buy her a gift, send lunch to her office without her asking, buy her a ticket to the concert of her favorite singer.
  3. DO THE HOUSE CHORES: There is no law that states that it is only a woman that should do all the house chores. Sometimes man: do the dishes, empty the trash, and clean the floor before she wakes up or returns from work.
  4. SEND HER A TEXT MESSAGE OR PHONE CALL DURING THE DAY:   Sometimes as men we can just get caught up with working hard to make ends meet for our families that we sometimes forget to take a moment to pause and show some love to the very people we want to provide for. So during the day, I humbly suggest that you at least once during the working day call or text your lady to see how she is doing or send her a love inspired text message.
  5. INVEST IN HER DREAMS: Your wife or lady has dreams in her soul that she’ll want to achieve in this life. You can wow her by buying one of the equipment that she’ll need to make the dream happen. If she wants to be a writer for example you can buy her videos on professional writing , if she wants to be a photographer you can buy her a good camera. By investing in her dreams you’re sending a massive message to her that you deeply want her to make progress.